‘How do you expect to be a good writer if you don’t read books?’ She asked me.
‘Well, I am not so much of a reader,’ I mumbled, ‘also I want to write my own stuff, that isn’t inspired by anyone.’
That Amigos, was me seven – eight years, ago. It tells you how young and naïve I was. Totally engrossed in my teenage life and all its confusion. Thinking I knew everything and how the world revolved around my palm, huh!
It was getting darker now. We’d stood outside her home for long. It had become an evening ritual of sorts. I’d walk her home slowly as the sun set in for the night and then we’d stand a few meters from her gate and talk. Apparently, we were dating. She was the first girl I dated immediately after high school. She gave me her heart. Her affection for me was evident.
I hate to admit this but I didn’t quite feel the same for her. I was a young ambitious lad (and stupid) with no clue of what love really meant. I guess it’s true after all, girls grow up faster than boys. She knew her way around those circles. Dating her was me trying to fit in with my boys. They all had girlfriends and before I asked her out, I thought to myself, ‘why not me?’
When the rodeo was over, I broke it off with her. She was hurt. Pleaded for a second chance, but I was long gone.
Sometimes, I regret ever being that stupid.
‘No! You are not doing it right, let me show you.’ She went on to kiss me. ‘Teaching’ me how to kiss right. Darn!
She was the hottest girl in the block. I kid you not! Her long, black natural hair that rested at her back, her beautiful figure and face crowned her that title. Countless fellas – myself included – could not understand how exactly I was the guy in the picture. She was way out of my league!
There was this tree next to the football pitch we used to hang out a lot. We’d take adventurous walks together and instinctively find our way there most times. The first time we kissed we were standing under its shade and the leaves swirled from the blowing wind. She loved preying on my boyish insecurities written all over my pimpled face. Teasing me to do things for her. I knew it without a doubt that this was a short-lived ‘thing’ but I couldn’t let myself accept that fact. I was happy to be in the moment for as long as it lasted.
It was all going well between us, I think. When she moved out of my neighbourhood (to a more, posh one), that was my cue to move on. I never heard much from her. And I never pursued either. My time was up and she was on to the next one.
This relationship begun as a bet as to who between the two of us would get the chance to date her first. Eric and I were seated idle on the sidewalk doing nothing much and listening to rap music from his phone. He spotted her walking from the shops heading our direction.
‘Hey, that’s the cute chic I was telling you about. She has a killer smile.’ Eric uttered.
I discreetly stared at her figure as she walked almost past us and stopped to respond to Eric’s flimsy ‘hi’. She smiled and walked away. That’s when we got into the bet.
Eventually, I won.
I’m convinced, there are certain people in our lives we should never date. Never ever date! She was one of them. The flirting, the suggestive smiles and countless texts exchanged was cool, until we got into a relationship.
As you’d guess, this relationship was pegged on the wrong desire and faulty foundation in the first place. But for some reason it drew me in. Further than I’d expected myself to get to. It was on and off between us, never really knowing what we were going through. Wale’s song, Love Hate Thing best describes this relationship. When I couldn’t pace around anymore, I broke it off with her – but this time, I left with a broken heart and a wounded ego. It’s a longer story Amigos, which, I’ll narrate to you one fine day. Maybe.
There was the scattering of girls I met along my love journey. Some I instantly liked, others were drawn to me first. Somehow, they remain less significant to me. I wonder what really was the lesson to learn in all those instances.
Love is an outlaw. She comes into your space and takes over everything. Most times, she means no harm. Only that the same beauty she presents us with can break us apart when things go haywire. And since none of us gets a manual on how to go about it, we learn. From our experiences and mistakes.
We meet people who love us, some don’t, some we lust for and others turn out to be the best thing that happened to us. And all this, is definitely worth a risk.
Love, is worth the risk.
My Girl (The One)
My love journey would lead me to her. Though it hadn’t been a smooth ride all along and I got lost along the way, she would find me. I’m glad things turned out this way. In many ways, I know that she’s the one for me. Every day I wake up is an opportunity to grow the love we share.
This is it for me. I never want to see the end of this love story. Till death do us apart.
What’s your flashback?