Five sons. That’s the number of kids I want to have. I hold this belief, the daughters will come much later when they are all grown up as my sons’ wives. Reina wants daughters and she wants lesser kids. We have resolved to something we call the battle of the genes. Allowing God and nature to toss the coin and for us to graciously love the kids we get. But something tells me Reina just might win in all this.
I think of Reina as mother to my kids and I feel at peace. For starters, I know they will be well nurtured and fed with an array of delicacies as the mother, a seasoned home cook (@Reina_Cooks) will see to it. Then I imagine them as neat freaks, orderly kids. They might pick up her eyes, which by all means I don’t protest to. They will definitely be better because of acquiring both Reina’s and my smarts. They will have my smile.
Reina will make a great mother.
Have you ever felt like our parents read from the same script? You meet a pal and they say something their mother used to say to them as kids and it sounds like a replica of what you grew up been told. I have a feeling Reina will have some of those traits, just maybe.
Every time I interact with my mother, we seem to talk more of the past. How it’s been raising me and the siblings over the decades. I’m amazed at how calm she is these days. Age does a number on you. Back then she used to be so aggressive. It was her way or the highway. You didn’t want to cross her. Now I see all the things our last born gets away with and I feel cheated. But I get it.
Somethings however haven’t changed.
Like how she has A1 skill for meddling in your stuff. She sent me a friend request on Facebook and I had to accept it. She likes some of my posts and it leaves me wondering what conversations we might have if she raises it up in our talks. I know the meddling comes from a place of love, wanting to know how her son is doing, but sometimes it goes overboard. Like how a ‘family friend’ asks about the new business you are starting yet you confided to Mum as a secret.
My Mum can get overprotective. How many of you guys had curfews growing up? Well that makes all of us. At one time my curfew was 7pm, then it was pushed to 6pm for not honouring it, I broke that and it was pushed to 5pm. She bought a home computer to keep me indoors, all the while it only lasted a few weeks then I was out of the door and into the world. She monitored my friends, my girlfriends, my potential enemies, everything. Her presence and dominance was ever imposing. It’s only now I see her perspective – she just wanted a well raised son to the world – back then I hated it.
Mum would give us everything she had and lack. She still will do the same. Mothers make for the most selfless people there is on earth. They go the extra mile. Many times I saw Mum put us first, especially financially. She catered for our needs first. Rearranged her life around our schedules and not the other way round. I remember once I was part of a church sports team and she skipped attending a wedding to see me race. It was a relay race, the first three chaps kept the pace and I – the last chap won the race. If I never won, she would still cheer me on.
Hey, don’t think fathers are not equally selfless or loving. It just happens this is a different post and that’s a different story.
Growing up Mum put a fire in me that I could believe in becoming great. I just needed to be determined enough. She was my first cheer leader. I think back at ideas I shared with her now and realize that her reaction and response was all meant to encourage me to keep believing in myself. They weren’t ground-breaking ideas but she saw them as such and that meant a lot.
There’s a deep sense of humour my Mum has that has stuck will us all. I marvel at how, when she was in good moods she’d make fun of almost everything. You’d think it’s a stand-up comedy skit in our home most days. She made us laugh through all seasons. Sometimes I’m all alone in my crib and a joke by my Mum comes to me and I end up cackling for minutes.
Mum has taught me to always look at life with a positive eye and to see the good in everything and everyone. She has taught me to believe that everything happens for a reason and things always work for good even when they don’t seem like it at the moment. There is always a silver lining in every cloud.
Thinking of Reina as a mother helps me see the huge responsibility she has over our future kids. Maybe mothers have a head start with the kids (9 months inside of her) and fathers need to catch up and match up to winning the child’s heart. But it should never be a contest really.
Seeing mothers for who they are and the work they put in will make any father with good sense treat the woman in his life right.
If you’re a mother and you’re reading this, I applaud you. Keep up the good work and be the best that you can be. To the father’s, lets live out the best lives we can live and give our loved ones the best. Your presence, love and commitment to your lady and the kids will leave a lasting impact, for better or worse. Choose wisely.
To Reina, see my wink?
Get a copy of my first novella here. Enjoy!